guard harder!

Finally some sort of happy post, i guess.....

Past four weeks of my elective attachment in XXH was like some of the longest days where they creeped by so so so so slooooooowly. With tonnes of other things to focus, I didn't quite enjoy the attachment as I expected it to be. The posting was in O&G, due to lots of limitations. I thought we were just flower pots in the wards looking nice, smiling away to mothers and babies. Other than talking , we were speaking with mothers. True! 4 weeks of talking and smiling. Luckily the staffs were kind enough to babysit us.......

Finally , it had came to an end today.

Big things never comes when you expect it.

Today, today I had my first hand experiences in delivery. Dare not say conducting a delivery, for some of reasons, we are not even allowed to even touch it !(this was an emergency)

Wanna know why? because some individuals thinks that there are more important things to attend to than to attend a woman in labour, then coming in late giving lame reasons according to their previous reasons. Anyway, I was grateful that there were people like that , if its not because of their *ahem* attitude, I might not get the experience today =D

What happened was.....

"wanna do artificial rupture of membrane arr?? "

"yar, bring the kidney dish"

"ok"

brings the kidney dish, and she starts digging into the 8th wonder of the world.

a huge round of pulling , screaming and comforting. pulling , screaming and comforting.

"err, cant la , its ok , just leave it as it is"

"ok"

2 secs after she left

splash!!!!! why so yellowish ??

" membranes already ruptured!!!"

" os already full, be careful"

an enormous round of screaming and pulling, and screaming and pulling

lifts up the gown, huh?? whats that yellow bun doing there, looks closely

"BABY'S HEAD!!! BABY'S HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

grabs the pad and guard, trembles........ . actually it was like just placing the pad under the 8th wonder of the world, pressure???? not so ........

And the wiser one comes in and take over....

was still trembling ..........

baby was all out, crying his lungs out.....

All the above happened in less than 3 minutes, I was still trembling .....

Unfortunately, there was still a second degree tear.

Why ? because everything happened too quickly and it wasn't guarded properly.

The right thing to do was: To guard harder and try to push the head low.

Thankfully, the person who is suppose to do all the above was finally there to repair the damage.

This was the biggest lesson I had for the entire attachment. And it only happened on the last day.....

Lucky me, I didn't had any training for these but I had a feel of it.

Thinking of it sends shiver down my spine.

Well , its time to reconsider on what I've thought all these while, one month wasn't enough to convince me.....

Fears when i Fret

I'm proud to announce my biggest fear now is ....... *drum rolls *

FRET!!!

there is nothing to fear about other than to FRET.

Fret: –verb (used without object), to feel or express worry, annoyance, discontent,

or the like:Fretting about the lost ring isn't going to help.

Yes. See that example from the dictionary, fretting isn't going to help.

But who would help me to stop fretting over things that is almost beyond my control???

I'm still paranoid about the fact that I fret and always have those thoughts blocked. It is actually quite stupid of it. Lately, nervous breakdown seems to be too common. Its easily masked but deeply engraved in the thoughts day by day .

Why am I going through this? Wouldn't it be so much better if I could be less sensitive in life.

Anyone kind enough to give me a break.

just some water

Japan has always been one of the greatest civilizations that I admired.

This little island , packed with people is one of the leading country of Asia's economy and technologies advancement. Today, it was hit by the force of nature with just some water. Whats on the news were terrifying. Some said that its a pirated version of what happened in Indonesia, 2004.

All it takes was just some of the much much water of the earth to wipe, bit by bit , maybe the entire civilization? Of all the effort and ego, no matter how smart human could be. Nature will still take its course. Its time to think about it.

May God bless Japan.

To my one and only

19 years ago, he was born and i'm no longer the only child in the family.

He came and brought along so much laughters, happiness and joy into my life.

He might be a bit disobedient at times , sometimes rebellious, but I believe he is clear of what he wants.

On this blessed day, I wanna wish you a happy 19th birthday !!

you know i love you =)

loving you always,

Che che

the world will never be the same without you

Yesterday , we celebrated the birthday of one of my favorite inventors of all time.

‎"I will not say I failed a thousand times, I will say I discovered there are a thousand ways that can cause failure."

THOMAS EDISON

If he is still alive today , he will age 164.

The invention lighted the civilization of all earth links.

Gone were the days has to end before the sun sets

or even burning midnight oil, desperately.

So tell me , will the world ever be the same without him ?

BRING IT ON!

After much procrastinations , I'm gonna get it done these two nights.

Be it on Zombie mode, I want this weekend to be a great one!

DND me in class , sometimes better things could be done, but its rather not allowed.

So i'm doing what is allowed, which is to be physically present with eyes wide open and to visit dreamland secretly.

BRING IT ON!

pointless

Me is no happy today but its suppose to be a happy day.

It seems pointless to celebrate when everyone is not happy in the inside and fake out a big wide smile from the outside. And you know what best? the closest persons suffers and they would also need to make up with all the fakings.

What is wrong with everyone? cant you people start talking and just wash off some freaking mood/hormones/wind/what so ever swing.

Being adults , i'm seriously not happy with this game , so stop expecting me to play well in this show, I will disappoint you!

Whats worse? Its torturing to actually post about this on the eve of the new lunar year, when everyone is enjoying good companion and having a good time. And I'm suppose to do so.

I'm disappointed with you!